Image: AI-generated art of a "child dressed as a cat"
[June 14, 2024 - I have made some (minor) edits to the original version of article, as it appears to be getting a bit more attention, and, in response to some comments from the therian community, I wanted to revise some language in order to be a bit more clear. If you are reading this as a part of the therian community, I welcome your discussion and input, and I hope that you forgive any ignorance I may have about therianthropy. I confess that I have written this article from the perspective of a child psychologist, and most of what I have written will pertain to younger (pre-adolescent) children - say ages 8-12 - who are in the early or emerging stages of exploring a therian identity. These are the things I have made an effort to better specify below (compared to the original article) but, in truth, there is very little scientific information about therianthropy, especially in children, and so much of what I have written here is an effort to explain what I believe is best for overall child mental health, while also sharing what I have seen in my experience as a child psychologist].
Actual article follows below:
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So your kid is an animal. I'm not talking metaphorically - like your child is wild or "out of control" like an animal. I'm talking about "furries" and the (perhaps) lesser known term therians. This growing trend that involves kids dressing and acting like animals can sometimes concern parents. Parents may worry about it just being "weird" or they may worry it's a sign that their child doesn't like who they are, so they are trying to be something else. In this blog, I'm going to just take a little time to explain what the trend is and what I think about it.
A "furry" is a sort of fandom. It typically involves people who enjoy the art of expressing themselves in an animalized way. Most commonly, they dress up as animals in a form of cosplay, but it can also involve a generalized interest in animals (typically certain "favorite" animals), which can be expressed through other artistic means too - drawing, reading, writing, etc.. Furries may also occasionally display animal-like behaviors, such as crawling on all fours, hopping around like a bunny, or meowing/hissing like a cat. In my experience, most often, furry culture involves what could be considered as "cute" animals - animals that can be kept as pets (dogs, cats, bunnies, etc.) or otherwise docile/non-aggressive animals that people tend to want to cuddle. This is why the term "furry" is used, because the animals depicted tend to be furry, soft, cuddly, cute, etc. However, technically a person could "furry" as any animal, even one without fur.
Still, most people who call themselves a "furry" will still call themselves human. They understand that when they are dressing up as animals, they are doing so for fun, or for art. Mostly, they do it just because they like it. This is especially true for kids. Kids love to play pretend and love to dress up. And once they learn about the "furry" culture, they may be drawn to it because it gives them a means to dress up and pretend to be like the creatures they love. Saying "I am a furry" is just a way for kids to say they like the culture of people who like to dress up as animals. There's nothing more to it than that. So, don't get worried. It's not "weird", it's just a "shorthand" for saying, "I like to dress up as animals, and I like meeting other people that like to do that too."
When kids do this, it's harmless. It's no different than any other type of pretend play, really. It's just humans doing "cute" humans things. And even if it's not something that interests you, particularly, it's okay to allow your child to explore and enjoy their own interest in this.
At the same time, it's also okay to teach them the real practical social consequences of behaving like an animal in the wrong places and at the wrong times. Encouraging them to wear their cat outfit to school may very well violate a school dress code, and it's okay to tell kids they can't wear whatever they want to school. This is true even if you don't fully agree with the idea of a dress code in the first place. But that's perhaps another argument for another time and place. Like it or not, school's and other places in society have dress codes, and there's nothing wrong with teaching children to comply with certain societal/cultural expectations, especially if such compliance is not going to harm them and is going to make their life easier. So, don't feel bad about telling your child they can't dress as a furry at school, but do allow them to do this at home if they want. Again, it's just another form of play, and kids will have plenty of other times and places in their life where the ability to play will be beaten out of them by the need to "grow up" or learn other responsibilities. So, give them space to play.
Therian is slightly different from "furry," and is typically harmless. Identifying as therian means that a person identifies as a non-human being, typically an animal, which might be a wolf, bear, cat, or maybe even a worm. It has a lot of overlap with the general "other kin" community of people who may identify with fantasy characters - elves, dragons, faeries, wizards, and so on). Again, for most kids, this is a harmless, playful way to engage with a like-minded community and to find camaraderie in something important to them. And kids tend to use the term "therian" differently than someone with more maturity might (i.e. adolescent or adult). For kids, most often, the term still captures the same idea of an antrozoomorphic (part human-part animal) identity, but in kids, it is often still more "fun" than it is a serious, "this-is-who-I-really-am-and-will-be-forever identity."
Later in development (though it's unclear when) therianthropy can become a more serious, spritual way of life. This developmental process could be considered much like that of religions, where people, as they mature, may become more spiritually minded and "involved" than they were as children, or they may "drift' away from that religion. So, like other spiritual beliefs, kids may solidify that belief over time as they grow into adults, or they may drift toward other spiritual beliefs. It's important as parents to again understand that therianthropy is not itself inherently harmful, and though it has some spirtual components it is not really considered to be a "religion" or anything like that. I am only using the metaphor above to reference similarties in the developmental process. So, it is okay to support kids as they develop this sprituatl mindset, and to keep an open mind and allow them to develop the mindset in whatever way makes sense to them. Again, this will be easier to support as kids mature and can engage in more mature conversation about what therianthropy means to them. When they're younger children (think like 8-12 years old), their engagment with the mindset and community may not be fully developed though. Consequently, my best recommendation is to just "let them be kids," and enjoy the fun of discovering therianthropy.
Rarely, adults may choose to take therianthropy to extremes and alter their body to look more like the animal or other-kin they love - they may get tiger stripes tattooed on their body, change the shape of their ears, or enlist other plastic surgeries that captures their identity. While atypical to go to this extreme, these extreme behaviors are still not inherently harmful, and the people that do them are not usually at great risk for problematic behaviors. They are also, again, extremely rare. Most people (kids included) are just in it for the community that comes with finding commonalities with like-minded people.
I mentioned above that therianthropy (identifying as therian) is a sort of spiritual mindset, allowing a crossing of human and non-human identities in a single unit. It is a thriving, though perhaps not well-understaood, academically or scientifically, culture, that has flourished in an increasingly online world, where therians can more easily find each other and openly relate about their identities. This link https://online.ucpress.edu/nr/article-abstract/16/3/7/70061/The-Beast-WithinAnthrozoomorphic-Identity-and will take you to an article that, in my reading, takes a careful and respectful view at therianthropy in modern culture.
Still, the most important thing I want to say with this article is that "furrydom" and "therianthropy" are most typically social behaviors/identities, more than anything - attempts to connect with others who like what they like. It's really no different than Arnold Schwarzenegger sculpting his body in incredible ways because of his love of the body-building community or joining a gaming club because you like to talk about videogames and identify as a "gamer". These people are all doing something they love, forming meaningful (usually healthy) identities in the process, and they are making connections with other people along the way who also happen to do that thing they love. So, if your child comes to you and tells you they are therian, don't freak out. In fact, go along with it, if you want. It's not going to hurt them, and, your support gives them space to figure out if this is a mindset that fits who they are going to be when they're older, or if they want to entertain other mindsets too. When I was a kid, I really liked basketball and other sports. I used to imagine I was Michael Jordan, and I spent a lot of time around gyms and with friends playing these sports. and I was pretty good. I thought, for a time, that perhaps I could even play professionally. It was a big part of my interest and my identity. But in my adulthood, I've not really played basketball now for >20 years. and if I tried to play now I'd be really bad. Like, for me, embarrassingly bad. For me, my interest in playing and being good at basketball was replaced by other interests (art, music, and humans), and those interests eventually solidified into who I am today. I still enjoy the sport, but I don't put my time anymore into being good at it. Many of your kids will be the same. The times in their life when they dressed as furries and/or called themselves therian will look different in adulthood than it does now, as kids. For many, the identtity can continue over time, and kids who were "furries' may cosplay at conventions routinely as adults. Or they may become artists who specialize in creating art featuring their beloved animal(s). The point is that you really can't predict at age 8-12 what a kid's spiritual mindset is going to be like when they're older, but it is okay to allow kids space and time to figure these things out over time, with proper supports In sum, it's common for kids to engage these interests as a form of play and personal exploration, and it's totally okay to encourage your kids to play. Even if you don't understand the origins of the interest, or why they've chosen to express the interest in the ways the do, it's okay to just let the interests follow whatever natural progression they happen to follow.
Hi all. I've made the difficult decision today to turn off future comments on this article. I appreciate the contributions everyone has made to this, but it has become increasingly difficult for me to monitor all the comments on here, especially as some get 'hidden" deeply in replies, and due to my worry that I won't catch all of comments in time to monitor them and to protect the community of children who may be reading this article, I am choosing to turn off comments.
There is a good chance I may post additional blogs in the future on this and related topics.
Some final words before I sign off:
1) I have much appreciated what I've learned from others…
Being therian is not a choice it is a in our blood its who we are
You explained this in a greater way, I but being a furry or therian isn't really a trend it just seams that way because with socal media more people can hear about it and relate to it.
I am a mom to a lovely, creative, playful, and imaginative 11-year old who has been using the terms “furry” and “therian” to describe her wolf play. Please give me grace, as I am new to these concepts, and I am reaching out to this forum to express my worry and angst that has come along with my child identifying as a wolf. Her friends and their parents have shunned my child as being a “freak” or weird; many have removed themselves from our life completly. My child is taunted at middle school, even though we do not allow her “wolf gear” to go to school, many kids still know that she identifies as a therian. I feel sadness, shame,…
Pretending to be animal is one thing, but thinking you're an animal is not. It's not healthy for parents to "go along with it."
I thought I was a dog from about 5 until I was 21. My parents refused to give into my dog-like ways so I hid it until I finally stopped at 21, which is when I realized I could never be a dog. Thinking I was a dog ruined a lot of my life in a lot of ways; from not getting married to not understanding normal human behavior.
I wish I'd gotten help for my delusion sooner.